Flex Appeal

Recently a Congressman from New York had to resign in shame after sending this shirtless photo to a woman he was trying to hook up with online.  People were obviously offended that this conservative law-maker was trying to cheat on his wife, and there has been plenty of outrage.  But I’ve also noticed some insulting comments, some mockery because of his shirtless bicep flexing that I feel is a very unfortunate trend.  I’ve seen comments that he looks “absurd” and “ridiculous”  (along with a few that he looks “hawt” and has some nice guns.)  The mockery is unfortunate because it paints the act of shirtless posing in a negative light — as if it’s laughable for a dude to feel good about his body and want to show it off.  It makes me wonder whether he would’ve been forced to resign if he had just sent e-mails to the woman without the shirtless photo.

The good thing about pro wrestlers is that they are never ashamed to get bare-chested and pop up a nice bicep flex, putting their guns proudly on display.  They know that posing and flexing appeals to many fans.  They realize that a man should be proud of his strength, showing off the muscles he worked so hard to develop, putting his body out there to be admired, appreciated, and maybe even worshiped.

Life is short and youth is fleeting, and it’s damn hard to maintain a body like that, so when you’re in this kind of shape, you really should get rid of all your shirts and just strut around flexing and showing off your torso all day.

I think women and the testosterone-deprived weaklings who can never build a powerful, bulging, desirable physique are jealous, which causes them to want to vilify and degrade the muscular male.  As these weaker people, full of Bicep Envy, have moved into positions of power and taken control of mass media, they’ve begun presenting strong manly bodies as something cheesy or absurd or shameful. They’ve taught men to hate their bodies.

Just like they keep telling us how ridiculous a man looks wearing a speedo, now they’re insisting that a man stripped to the waist flexing his pythons is an object of humor and disdain.  What better way to ruin, discredit, and humiliate the cocky Congressman than by laughing at his shirtless body that he is obviously very proud of (and ought to be.)

But pro wrestlers, God bless them, are not so post-modern or politically correct or brain-washed as to feel embarrassed about their hyper-masculine bodies.  They haven’t been subjugated, yet, by the effeminate Powers-That-Be who would have you believe that the muscular male is now ridiculous.

Wrestlers still enjoy giving us a good gun show, and they realize the fans like watching it.  They still celebrate masculinity.   Watching a pro wrestling show often provides you with a bonus body-building competition, a parade of hard-bodied eye-candy.

In the wild, many animals protect their territory and attract mates with a spectacular display, like a peacock flashing his tail feathers.  I suppose since caveman days, the way for a man to demonstrate that he can be a good provider and protector, or to intimidate an attacker, has been to show his biceps, the symbol of a man’s power and physical strength.

So no matter how many times they tell us that a muscle-flexer is a loser, we’re still hard-wired going back to our roots to stare at and appreciate and respect a flexed muscle.  Go flex your bicep in public somewhere and watch how many heads turn.

A well-built, over-sized bicep with an impressive peak is, of course, the ideal.  But bicep size shouldn’t stop a man from flexing and posing.  Even if you don’t have arms like softballs, you shouldn’t feel ashamed to flex your muscles.  It is adorable for a man with thin arms to display what he’s got even though he isn’t massive.  Having the confidence to put your body on display for the scrutiny and judgment of other people is the important thing.  Trust me, people will love it.  So take a cue from pro wrestlers and feel proud to show off your man muscles — everyone will love seeing it.