Awesome Armbars

I have been lucky to find some of the most awesome Armbar photos online recently.  A big THANKS to whoever posted these images!   You may be wondering what makes the images in this gallery qualify as “Awesome” Armbars as opposed to basic, run-of-the-mill generic Armbars.  Isn’t it just a guy kneeling there embracing another guy’s arm??

I’m not sure I can define what makes some Armbars really work — let me try to sort it out.  Certainly it must have something to do with their facial expressions — look at the orgasmic expression on this victim’s bearded mug.  Also the way the arms are tightly interlocked — Windham gripping his own forearm and the other guy’s bicep is sexy for some reason…

Also the positioning of the bodies to show off the best parts of both men is critical for an Awesome Armbar.  The dominant man should be sticking his big flexed Bicep in our face as this muscleman in the baby-blue tights is doing.  Yeah, show off that peak — a cocky display of male power and strength.

The victim’s body should be exposed to us — his chest stretched wide, his nipples clearly visible, his bulging crotch open and vulnerable.  Is it simply a coincidence that this wrestling hold tends to place the wrestlers in these iconic positions of Power versus Submission, or do they teach the rookies to strike these poses in pro wrestling school?  “Yeah — that’s it Kid!  Act like a slab of meat on a platter.  Think about showing the fans even way back in the cheap seats your body and ballsack!”

Immobilization is also a key feature in an Awesome Armbar.  The victim should appear paralyzed by the tightness and effectiveness of the hold, rendered as motionless and helpless as Han Solo when Boba Fett froze him in carbon or whatever.  The victim should be a statue, carved to depict the Weakness and Suffering of Mankind.

The irony of an Armbar is its simplicity as a wrestling hold and probable ineffectiveness.  Clearly the dominant man is barely applying any pressure, yet the victim willingly makes himself to appear frozen and therefore unmanly.  One gets the sense he is playing along, allowing himself to be emasculated by appearing to be under the other man’s control.  And that’s OK — that’s exactly what makes an Armbar awesome.

So is this old black-and-white Armbar considered Awesome?   Well, we have the huge, bulging biceps of the attacker on proud display (and some big titties too, nice.)  We have the victim frozen in a pose of helplessness as if he’s playing Freeze Tag — his stomach, chest, and nips exposed to our view.

With that mask, we don’t exactly have that sexy facial expression that reads: “OWW!  He is breaking my ARM!”  However, this jobber makes up for it with his opposite arm, the one he is leaning on.  Check out his fingers outstretched to express his agony.  Instead of “Spirit Fingers”, I think I will call those “Suffer Fingers.” So yes, this Armbar meets the Awesome criteria.

An Armbar can also gain extra Awesome points by depicting a powerhouse being forced down into a submissive kneeling position.  Lex Luger was very good at this (and seemed to actually enjoy that Helpless Bitch position.)

As the “Total Package,” Flexy Lexy was supposed to be an absolute paragon of power, able to break mortal men across his broad shoulders using his devastating Torture Rack.  Yet in these images, the power is transferred to the more masculine opponents, and the simple Armbar reduces Lex to a kneeling play-toy.  All those Arm Curls he must have performed to build up those massive meat-hooks, yet a simple Armbar turns him into a mewling little kitten.

Instead of swole muscles, these wrestlers use hairy chests and facial hair as their signifiers of masculinity and power.  The effect is still the same — one man who ought to be a dominant daddy is seen ceding control over to another, more potent male.

Jimmy Garvin is always a treat in his bright white trunks and boots.  That pure white gear worked so well with his swarthy, hairy, thick physique — made him seem even sleazier and sexier somehow.  Awesome Gear is kind of like an Awesome Armbar — it’s hard to explain but I know it when I see it…

Do I even need to point out why this Armbar qualifies as Awesome?  That killer bod is on display, the bulge hanging there as the muscle-rookie reaches back to feel the dominant daddy’s goatee.

I would say this rookie paid careful attention during Suffering Class when his pro wrestling instructors taught him how to show off his muscles, nipples, abdomen, and crotch.  This is really A Plus work.

This fantastic cartoon drawing that someone recently posted really pulls it all together, combining all the required aspects that make up an Awesome Armbar.  The artist really knew what he was doing when he drew this!

We see the big bicep, the requisite O-Face on the victim, their arms tightly woven (hands gripping flesh everywhere), the nipples and other body parts of the helpless (formerly powerful) muscleman on display, some chest hair signifying the dominant man’s masculinity, really all the boxes are checked.

I also like to see those little drops of sweat dripping from their interlocked arms and falling toward the victim’s handsome face.  A very well-placed little extra touch!