Someone recently posted this entertaining Brit Pro match to YouTube. Both wrestlers dress in kinky costumes to generate some pre-match heat — the creepy Rasputin wearing a long monk’s robe, and smiley young Greg Valentine in a shiny uniform like a male exotic dancer.
One advantage that British pro wrestling had over the American brand was that their Greg Valentine was prettier than ours. He is the ideal BritPro Face: young, vulnerable looking, and willing to suffer.
Yes, Valentine is fun to look at, but it was actually this big Heel — “Rassling Rasputin” as the commentator calls him — who inspired me to write about this match. What a fantastic Heel — playing off the notoriety of that infamous “Mad Monk” Rasputin who mind-fucked the Russian Tsar’s wife. I just love that magnificent silver-blond hair flowing down his back, and that massive, masculine physique! Long black tights and boots complete the look and have me yearning for the classic, violent, kinky age of pro wrestling hotness.
The big brute takes control of his cute young victim, draping his throat over the top rope and hammering the back of his head. Rasputin is much larger, older and sleazier than the boy-next-door — a lecherous monk who seems to enjoy rough violence. We get the sense that the creepy monk is somehow molesting the younger man, or would molest Valentine if he could get him in private.
Valentine over-sells every move (I love that about him.) If Rasputin even touches him on the back of the head, or shoves him into the corner, the jobber acts like he was just hit with a stun gun on full power. He willingly throws himself down and rolls around suffering at Rasputin’s feet after every offensive move. Some may say Valentine is over-doing it, but I sure dig it!
This Rassling Rasputin with that long flowing hair and beard sure makes for a great Heel. He is decidedly masculine with that massive hairy body, aggressive attitude, and black gear, but that thick, wavy mane gives him an effeminate vibe that really bumps up his sex appeal.
I don’t even care if this big stud can wrestle. I don’t care if he uses zero actual holds, I just want to watch him strut around and fluff his hair while pretty-boy Valentine lies beaten at his feet.
Brit-Pro wrestling bouts are broken into rounds, similar to boxing. After the bell rings to end the round, asshole Rasputin rushes over to kick the suffering pretty-boy right in the head. That is totally unnecessary, and the prim and proper British fans get worked up over cruelty like this. These dastardly little acts of viciousness make me love this big hairy Heel even more.
The rest break between rounds didn’t do much to help Valentine. He continues his over-wrought suffering in Round 2. Here Rasputin devastates him with a huge Elbow Smash to the back of the head (a sweet move he repeated about 6 or 8 times throughout the match.) Valentine is totally defenseless against this big monk’s cruel Elbows, exactly what the British fans love to see.
Rasputin tortures his victim in a beautiful Back Breaker, wrenching the rookie’s back to force a submission. Again displaying his sadistic side, the monk continues to apply the pressure after the bell sounds (yes, I love that!)
The ref eventually gets pissed off enough to disqualify Rasputin and award the match to Valentine. That is one advantage of American pro wrestling over the British version — our refs almost never take action to actually stop the Heels’ dirty shenanigans.
