David Letterman hosted the final episode of his talk show last night (actually early this morning.) In the weeks leading up to his retirement, many people have been sharing memories of their favorite moments from the show.
As a wrestling lover, it’s easy to guess my favorite episode: the July 29, 1982 show featuring pro wrestler Jerry Lawler and comedian Andy Kaufman. I always enjoyed seeing pro wrestling invade the mainstream consciousness and hearing people talk about my secret obsession.
Pro wrestler Jerry Lawler enters the studio looking confident and masculine in his flamboyant orange pants and shirt unbuttoned to show off his hairy chest.
You can see the video from this episode on YouTube. Next we see Andy Kaufman wearing a neck brace, a souvenir from a recent wrestling match against Lawler and evidence of Lawler’s superior power. The cocky Alpha Male proceeds to emasculate Kaufman: “His father wanted a boy, his mother wanted a girl, and they were both satisfied.”
Kaufman clearly had a boner for wrestling. He wanted to wrestle women, he wanted to wrestle men, he just plain got off on wrestling. They say he never cashed the checks from his appearances on Memphis pro wrestling shows, so apparently he felt compensated in other ways — perhaps from the exciting memories of his match against Lawler, which is then recapped on Letterman in a brief video.
Wearing a white bodysuit to cover his flesh, Kaufman is seen in the ring against the larger male in his trademark black singlet and red tights. Lawler easily dominates the “wimp” — hoisting him upside down to violently Pile-Drive him on his head. I love it!
Kaufman is portraying the fish-out-of-water, the untrained actor who haplessly enters the ring with a stronger, more aggressive, and fully-trained killer. The power imbalance that this trope represents, the ease with which the wrestling stud can demolish the weaker man, makes this an enticing situation. Many of my fantasies back when this interview aired on Letterman involved normal guys facing off against wrestlers.
The clip from Memphis pro wrestling continues. The bell is ringing, but Lawler is not finished with Kaufman. He drags the ragdoll up by the head, clamps his thighs around the helpless man’s neck, and Pile-Drives him a second time! This was the stuff that wrestling obsessions are made of — the relentless torture of a helpless man after the bell.
I actually did not see this episode of Letterman when it first aired — it was past my bedtime. But my classmate, Jimmy, apparently did not have a bed time. He came in to school the next day bursting to tell us about what he saw.
As we peppered him with eager questions, Jimmy told us all about how angry Lawler seemed, and how loud-mouth Kaufman kept bitching about his neck, and how shocked Letterman seemed when the situation spun out of control.
Jimmy’s brilliant narrative was very intoxicating for a wrestling lover to hear. Any time a classmate would recap moments from a pro wrestling match (or a wrestling-related incident), I was all ears.
Obviously, wrestlers carried on and insulted each other on their wrestling shows — it was part of the schtick. But to have this scene unfold on Letterman, a mainstream, legitimate program (even back in 1982) lent realism and drama to this encounter. And for a famous actor to be involved made the feud seem even more realistic. As an impressionable youngster, I bought the whole performance, believing that big, hunky Lawler really was angry and determined to make Kaufman pay dearly.
Damn, Jimmy’s description had me so desperate to see this episode of Late Night, but back then, if you forgot to video tape a show like this, there was little chance of catching it as a rerun. (Little did I know that a home computer would eventually offer easy access to every show ever broadcast…)
I wonder if old Jimmy was a wrestling lover like myself? He sure seemed excited to recap every detail of this man-vs.-wrestler encounter. If I knew then what I know now, me and Jimmy could’ve been best friends…
Next, the Letterman show presented interviews with Kaufman acting arrogant and insulting (this time with HIS shirt unbuttoned to emphasize his manly chest fur.) Kaufman comes off as a real prick, mocking the intelligence of southerners and touting his fame as a television star.
These interviews help to justify the violence that Lawler unleashed on this mouthy runt. We begin to feel that Kaufman got what he deserved — that he is playing a dangerous game by baiting the big Alpha Male.
Having not seen this episode when it aired (and relying on Jimmy’s colorful recap), I began to fantasize that the scene was even more exciting than it was.
I pictured Lawler appearing for his interview shirtless in trunks and boots. I imagined him repeatedly Pile-Driving Kaufman right in Dave’s studio. In my fantasy version, Lawler climbed up on Dave’s desk and dropped a Flying Elbow Smash down on Kaufman’s chest as Letterman pleads for order.
As they go into commercial, Lawler is finally fed up with his mouthy nemesis. He stands up and bitch-slaps the cocky comedian right out of his chair! This was a shocking act of aggressive violence happening right in front of Dave and the entire nation! This is the moment people have remembered for decades.
When we return from commercial, Kaufman goes on a tirade, using some of the most inappropriate language ever uttered on a talk show as Dave sits reading a paper and wishing he were back in Indiana. Kaufman’s angry outburst added even more spice and realism to the performance, as if he can no longer control his passions after Lawler’s degrading slap. Jimmy sure thought the whole incident was real and had most of us who were listening to his tale fully sold.
This scene made me a lifelong fan of Letterman, and of Lawler, and even of Andy Kaufman’s odd performances. I was sure glad for this distraction which turned a boring day at school into a colorful, arousing experience thanks to Jimmy’s story-telling abilities and my own fertile imagination. Thanks Dave, and good night.