Davey sexualizes the move with some hip grinding.
I recently came upon a YouTube video posted by a new promotion out of Canada called “Smash Wrestling.” In the video, one of my favorite Tag Teams, the American Wolves, were in action against a Heel Team known as “Fourth Gunn” — Drew Gulak and Biff Busick.
The Wolves are always a pleasure to watch. They “get” the psychology of Tag Team wrestling, so you had better believe I was into this match and also happy to see another new promotion providing good content and gaining popularity.
THIS converts Eddie from stud into sufferer.
The story we are told by the commentators is that Fourth Gunn — the stable of cheaters who wear black trunks and fuck with everybody — are out of control. So the promoter has recruited the American Wolves to come to Canada and teach them a lesson.
However, Eddie gets a lesson after he misses this Shoulder Tackle to smash his own shoulder into the corner post.
Eddie's skull bounces like a soccer ball.
This “clean up” gimmick refers to a classic storyline from the early days of pro wrestling, when Baby Faces would promise the fans that they would “clean up” wrestling by defeating the bad guys, somehow chasing the cheaters away.
I never exactly understood HOW the sincere but ineffectual Good Guys would accomplish this house cleaning. How does pinning a man cause him to move away from the area? Can you reform a rule-breaker by out-wrestling him? In any case, it was adorable to hear our heroes promise to eliminate cheating when you knew the villains were just going to tear them limb from limb.
Oh how I love a good Double-Team!
The notion of “cleaning up wrestling” also implies that we even want it cleaned up. All our fun and excitement come from the devious cruelty and blatant, creative rule-breaking by the villains. Taking cheating out of wrestling is like taking Jaeger out of the Bomb.
Who would want to watch a federation where Dudley Do-Right wrestles sportingly against Mr. Clean?
In any case, we needn’t have worried about the American Wolves teaching these Heels to become Altar Boys because Gulak and Busick are great at what they do. They gain control of our Face-in-Peril Eddie Edwards and just pummel the Good Boy from pillar to post for like 20 minutes. It is a really long, really devastating display of ass kicking.
Eddie shows off tons of beautiful suffering imagery: laying panting on the mat while his attackers casually stalk him; draping his body on the ropes like his bones have turned to jelly; reaching pathetically for a tag when his partner is 5 miles away; groaning really loud; etc.
It probably hurts like hell, but I still want Gulak to do that to me.
The commentators refer to Drew Gulak as the “Harry Potter of professional wrestling” when he employs this creative punishment hold. He has Eddie’s foot trapped against his chest, then he rolls back and scissors his squeeze-toy between his long legs.
Check out Davey in the background (boot propped sexily on the bottom rope), looking outraged or possibly jealous over the fun Drew is having with Eddie right now.
The Wolves did enjoy some moments of domination as well — it wasn’t just Eddie suffering and looking weak the entire time (although that would be fine with me.) For example, below is a hot demonstration of Team Work and Symmetry as the Wolves slap on a pair of Boston Crabs.
That dirty kill move finishes Eddie off.
But the Wolves’ promise to teach Fourth Gunn a lesson proves empty as Eddie is destroyed with this very vicious, very hot finisher. From Torture Rack position, Eddie is hoisted skyward, where Busick is just waiting to slam an Uppercut square to the back of his skull.
Clearly Busick and Gulak are just too powerful and evil. If the Wolves can’t subdue them, then nobody will ever be able to put them in their place! (Good — I love their power!)
From what I’ve seen so far, Smash Wrestling is a winner — another great source of entertaining wrestling content. Keep it coming, Internet! I like how the Heels in Smash Wrestling are unbeatable and their Faces (in this case, Eddie Edwards) suffer beautifully. I enjoyed their reference to the old “Clean Up Wrestling” trope that I grew up fantasizing about. The video quality and camera work are good too.
It seems that Smash Wrestling offers a subscription channel at https://ondemand.smash-wrestling.com/ for like $7.49 per month. If they keep showing us good stuff like this, I may have to subscribe. Does anybody have a membership? How is it?
i HATE HIS BULGE