On the August 8th episode of Smackdown, they threw Randy Orton in the ring for yet another beating at the hands of Jinder Mahal. We’ve seen Jinder knock Randy’s dick in the dirt so often, I’m starting to lose count, but the formula is still working for me.
As soon as they announced this upcoming match, I found myself feeling really excited to watch Randy in agony inflicted by the awesome Maharajah. I can recall often feeling that giddy excitement when, at the beginning of a wrestling show, they’d announce: “Later in the program, we’ll see Terry Taylor do battle with the One Man Gang!” or something and I’d be all turned on anticipating Terry’s suffering. This was before you could Fast Forward to the good stuff.
Oh you nasty little slut
Randy’s tongue is working overtime as he checks out the powerful Maharajah. Randy can’t get over that massive chest glistening in oil, and those swole biceps that Jinder got all pumped up and hard before he came out to show off his body. Mmmmm.
The commentators mention a few times that the Bollywood Boys are absent so “Randy has Jinder Mahal all to himself.” (Like they’re alone together on a romantic get-away.)
This bout was billed as a non-title Grudge Match — basically it’s just an opportunity for Randy to take back a little pride and redeem his masculinity by fighting back (for once) against the dominant Maharajah. I guess they don’t want their wrestlers too seem like totally submissive pussies.
So Randy starts the fight by acting aggressive and powerful, throwing Mahal outside the ring and slamming his back onto the barrier for example. But I prefer seeing Jinder dominate Randy, grinding him into the mat in front of his daddy for example, so I skipped over much of Randy’s shine. I Fast Forwarded to the good stuff.
Randy is reminded of his proper role as Beta Male.
The tide turns when Randy takes Jinder outside the ring and positions him on a desk at ringside, I suppose to RKO him onto the desktop.
But the Maharajah refuses to serve as Randy’s bitch. He shoves Randy gut first into a hard barrier at ringside. OOOFFF!
This is where the fun begins for me — Jinder just punishing Randy. I love it when he kneels on Randy’s neck for example, then stands over him looking so arrogant and dominating. All hail the Maharajah — long may he reign!
One of the commentators describes the scene in colorful and titillating language:
“Jinder Mahal is a grinder. He likes to keep an opponent down and just BEAT him!”
Oh yeah, THAT’S why Jinder is the muthafuckin CHAMP!
Whoa, Jinder is playing rough tonight! Watch him DROP Randy with this stunning Super Kick to the face! POP!
Randy plays along, collapsing to the canvas like a mighty oak tree that’s been cut off at the roots.
But the point of the match is for Randy to finally take revenge on the cocky Indian who has been humiliating him each week for months. So Randy quickly recovers and regains control.
This is the ending of their feud, a break-up of their Bromance. Both wrestlers unfortunately will face different opponents at Summer Slam on Sunday. The Face of the WWE can’t go out looking like a wimp, so Randy isn’t laying down for Jinder tonight. Still, it was fun watching Jinder own and punish this hot jobber in all their earlier encounters.
Nobody gets up from the RKO (unfortunately).
Jinder locks Randy in this sexy Cobra Sleeper and I’m wishing they’d end the match with Jinder putting his wimpy bitch-boy to sleep before our eyes. We need more Sleepers in pro wrestling these days!
But oh yeah, this is Randy’s revenge match, so he breaks free and wastes Jinder with his patented RKO for the victory.
So Randy defeats Jinder at last and redeems his Man Card. He has earned the right to pose on the ropes and put his big dick in our faces to remind us he’s a Man.
But did Randy truly earn back everything he lost to Jinder? After all, this was a non-title match, so Jinder gets to keep the belt.
Also, Randy’s revenge match took place on the weekly Smackdown show which is less historic or less epic than the Pay-per-View events where Jinder was seen utterly owning poor Randy. Plus, I heard people booing Randy during this match, so he was still bested in many ways by the Maharajah — he was not fully redeemed.
Randy worked hard for us tonight!
Speaking of hot, check out Randy’s body, glistening under the lights as he saunters backwards toward the locker room. Nice abs, and nice nips there Randy — I SURE won’t be booing you as long as you continue to look like that and rassle shirtless for us.
But shouldn’t you be watching where you’re going, big guy?
And you’ll get a lot more of that on Sunday…
Out from the backstage area, we see big Rusev also Super-Kick Randy in the face to drop him. Rusev is the beast who is going to beat up Randy at Summer Slam next Sunday, so he’s just using this opportunity to establish his dominant role.
I will miss seeing Jinder tearing Randy limb from limb, but a feud with the big sadistic brute known as Rusev will be fun to watch too. I hope he puts Randy in his back-snapping Camel Clutch hold! Now I can’t wait to see that one!
Just as Randy managed to conquer his longtime opponent/studcrusher Jinder, in steps a new unknown Monster for him to battle. What a teaser!