The writer of the “Inner Jobber” blog, recently posted a review of the squash match featuring handsome Alex Riley getting mauled by the brutal Lord Tensai. He called the article “Beautiful Stranger” because we haven’t seen Alex on television lately. You can check out the hot match on YouTube if you missed it when it aired and/or your DVR is, for some unknown reason, not recording every wrestling show.
In his article, Inner Jobber wrote a series of criteria — a rating scale, if you will — to determine whether a jobber squash is, in fact, hot. This will help whoever rated this great match only One Star some standards for knowing when to award the maximum point value to a match.
I decided to text Inner Jobber’s criteria against an old school jobber squash that I find fairly exciting and entertaining: the Spoiler beating down Max Blue. It’s a fairly stiff whipping — not for the faint of heart. It’s also posted on YouTube so you can check it out if you’re into that sort of thing.
Below is my own humble scoring of the match using Inner Jobber’s nine criteria for a hot squash, which verifies that the Inner Jobber scale is quite accurate:
Wow! This was a seriously hot match! Awesome to see the scale applied to another match. I can’t believe that the claw even matched up–that was so specific! I always love your site–thanks for making me feel a part of it today!
Love ya, but I think you missed the point. It’s about gym muscleboy wrestlers getting humiliated, and not hairy chested doughboys. The cleancut studs with the guns and the pecs thinking they’re hot shit up against the 340 bruiser and getting pubically humiliated. Muscle vs Monster obvious squash that excites us to identify with the stud that gets beaten down unfairly forced to flex our big gym muscles. Nothing more humiliating than your proud muscles defeated and ridiculed by some fat bastard!
Aw, let’s get some variety up in this bitch! I mean, nobody can tell me that Davey Rich, Gregg Sawyer or the Gambler aren’t good for a hot squash! (Which isn’t to take anything away from the clean-cut studs. Room for everyone!)