The NWA Classics website recently posted this match involving strange stakes. Steve Keirn from the “Fabulous Ones” was feuding with Chavo Guerrero. They agreed that the winner of this match would have the pleasure of smearing yellow paint on the loser’s body. (It sounds kinda gay — I like it!)
Chavo fills out his stretchy red trunks nicely.
Both of these veterans are beefy and heavy looking, wearing those snug, clingy trunks that were in style at the time. The trunks’ fabric back then looked soft, almost like cotton, and really hugged the wrestlers’ ass and ball-sack. Today the trunks appear more plastic and synthetic — not as fun to stare at.
One of my many wrestling-related kinks is an obsession with animal-print trunks. Maybe I watched too many Tarzan movies growing up. It’s just a savage, sexy look, to enter a fight wearing what appears to be a wild animal’s hide. GRRR!
Keirn’s look also references the male exotic dancer gimmick. The Fabs often wore matching zebra or snakeskin trunks, surprising their horny fans with one exciting outfit after another.
Get over here so I can stuff a dollar in your waistband!
Pro wrestling felt so seedy and inappropriate back then, what a rush. These big brawny dudes letting it all hang out, sweating, biting, and bleeding all over each other in tight dick-displaying underwear, slopping paint on the loser like some BDSM fetish scene. How the hell could anyone NOT be turned on by all that raunchy shit!?
By shining early in the bout, we know that Chavo is the Baby-Face. He plays the role of the super-skilled Technical Luchador, applying several classic moves: a gorgeous Indian Deathlock, a Mexican Ceiling (almost), and this one-armed Camel Clutch.
Keirn will need to fight dirty to defeat this experienced veteran!
No wonder you’re wearing tiger stripes, you damn animal!
Face-biting is the dirty tactic that Keirn uses to gain control over the better wrestler. He gnaws on Chavo’s forehead three times to draw blood (but the stupid ref kept getting in the way, so this is the best biting scene I was able to capture.) We’ve seen this beast bite Chavo until he bled before, in a wild Tag Team match I wrote about in March 2016.
This match is another example of the Down-Trodden Immigrant trope that we often see in pro wrestling. The hard-working (but somewhat naive) foreigner, fresh off the turnip truck, entering this fast-paced capitalist society just hoping for a fair chance to succeed.
But the clever, entitled, devious white man uses sneaky tricks to oppress and exploit the clueless rube. Our hearts go out to the mistreated migrant (who is looking pretty nice in those snug red briefs…)
Chavo plays the helpless punching bag beautifully.
Keirn does whatever he can to keep the blood flowing from the cut he opened on Chavo’s forehead, including grinding a boot on his face and repeatedly walloping his forehead.
Chavo knows his role, submissively allowing Keirn to do whatever the hell he wants to him.
Chavo surprises Keirn and wins the bout!
Suddenly Chavo snaps on a German Suplex and Keirn is helplessly pinned! The audience goes wild!
Chavo has won the match, so Keirn must now lie down and submit to being slowly painted yellow. That was the stipulation, and that’s what the excited audience is eager to witness, so the loser needs to comply.
The brass knuckles explain that big heavy bulge.
But Keirn is not some gullible bumpkin who obediently follows the rules and honors his commitments. He won’t be degraded by allowing Chavo to slosh paint all over his fabulous bod.
So Keirn fishes a foreign object from deep in his trunks and clocks Chavo in the skull. Chavo then responds with a Pile Driver:
Stan Lane rushes to his partner’s aid.
The wrestlers tease us over who will end up with the humiliating yellow paint all over his flesh. Keirn’s boyfriend gets involved, snapping Chavo’s throat over the top rope.
I like that Stan Lane wore those USA flag shorts, another visual reference to the theme of the imperialist American oppressors doing whatever they must to sustain their dominance.
HEY — he WON the match! This is not RIGHT!
Keirn smears creamy fluid on the beaten man’s chest and back as if he’s marking his territory, splooging it all over his victim.
The color yellow implies gutlessness. “Yellow-bellied coward” is an insult originally from England to degrade the under-class who lived in the marshlands. So this paint-job is a major humiliation for Chavo.
The yellow paint almost looks white in the bright lights. Is this meant to symbolize the denial and destruction of Chavo’s ethnicity, as if they white-washed his brownness away, forcing him to accept the dominant culture if he wants to stay in this country?
As the mistreated immigrant Baby-Face, Chavo sadly accepts his degradation. The whole scene feels naughty, unfair, degrading, inappropriate, sexually suggestive, and therefore arousing.