The YouTube channel Richard Land often uploads entire full episodes of classic wrestling shows. I especially enjoyed this Tag Team match that begins at 1 hour, 14 minutes into the video called WWF at LA Sports Arena 11/17/88.
The first things that caught my eye were those bun-hugging red trunks on the Young Stallions, Roma and Powers. The Stallions are battling the uber-masculine, ever sadistic Brain Busters — Arn Anderson and Tully Blanchard with their hairy chests, beefy physiques, and sadistic attitudes. Mmmm.
The teams present an interesting contrast in masculine archetypes. Arn and Tully represent the traditional, hairy-chested, stoic and hard-assed style of manhood your grand-daddy grew up on. The Young Stallions offer an alternative and modern depiction of manliness: physically beautiful, gym-built and swole, self-consciously hairless, and eager to be seen as attractive — like females. We will see which type of manhood reigns supreme…
Wow — twice as hot as a single Figure 4 Leglock.
The Young Stallions dominate the competition at first (especially Paul Roma who is presented as an unbeatable Muscle God for the first 95% of this match.) I am all for a little Babyface Shine to get us turned on to them, but I really couldn’t wait for the Brainbusters to finally isolate Jimmy Powers and commence his demolition.
One really cool Babyface maneuver involved the Stallions slapping on this matched pair of Figure 4 Leglocks, rocking their bodies in stereo as they ratchet up the pressure. I love when they mirror each other like that, it’s so wonderfully gay.
That’s cool — let’s just watch the match from this camera angle.
When the Jimmy Powers torture scene finally begins, we notice that one of the ringside cameras, which I’m calling the Trunk Cam, has been positioned squarely behind the Baby-Face corner to gaze relentlessly at Roma’s backside.
Not only do we get to watch Powers being torn limb-from-limb by the Brainbusters, we also get to watch Roma’s reactions. He periodically flexes and clenches, readjusting his weight, waving that little Italian flag on his right buttock from side to side. Does he know he’s being stalked like this from behind? Does he mind us gawking at his muscular ass, or did he wear those too-tight red satin briefs specifically to encourage us to rape him with our eyes?
Oh how I love the old Knee Spiker!
The Trunk Cam hurries to the Heel side of the ring to capture the clingy spandex on big Arn’s full bottom. Here Arn lifts his knee so his partner can slam Jimmy Powers’ face right into it. That always seemed so cruel and hot to me — deliberately inserting your knee between the ropes to create a hard surface in order to harm the double-teamed victim’s brain.
Meanwhile handsome Jimmy Powers sells his agony beautifully, see below image:
OK now I think Roma is teasing us on purpose.
As Powers is manhandled into the corner, Roma lunges for a desperate tag, with the picturesque landscape panned by the faithful Trunk Cam.
Roma spreads his powerful legs, stretching that thin red fabric to the limit. The low position of the Trunk Cam offers a view down deep through the valley with a peek at the hillock waiting on the other side.
The Young Stallions were the epitome of the 80’s Muscle Face Tag Team. They were pure eye candy, and they understood their role very well. This is why I’ve blogged about them multiple times already, and why I’m still blogging about this match which took place over 25 years ago.
For example, Jimmy Powers is thrown from the ring, and rather than simply lie on his stomach to suffer, he flips around and shows us that glistening chest, those big nips, that powerful gym-built physique twisted in agony.
Later he strikes this pose where, for no real reason other than to give us boners, he stretches backward over the edge of the ring to expose that torso. See below image:
THAT will teach you to strut around looking so hot.
The Brainbusters then punish Powers for his fantastic looks and homo-erotic peacocking. After Tully Irish Whips the stud, Arn levels him with a brutal clothesline.
Our take-away is that, you can work out and sculpt a pretty body, but you’re still no match for aggressive, hairy-chested Real Men who are willing to cheat to win.
Now I remember why I was always an Arn fan.
Arn Anderson then gets in on the peacocking by strutting confidently toward the Trunk Cam, just proudly displaying himself and his masculinity as Powers suffers behind him. Hmm, he may not be as beautiful as Jimmy Powers, but he’s got my undivided attention as he approaches the camera and shows off his manly physique.
Hell no, he is not going to reposition those trunks to smooth them over his heavy and prominent bulge. Do you think a Real Man really cares if you ogle him?
Great wrestling minds must really think alike. By total coincidence, the blog known as He Is Out! also posted a Paul Roma gallery today, with the stronger Stallion in his trademark red trunks being sexily beaten and tossed out to the floor by a fully-covered masked man known as The Shadow. We did not even plan this synchronized Paul Roma Day!
Anyway, back inside the ring, we get more Jim Powers abuse, and more Trunk Cam shots of Roma watching tensely from outside the ropes.
Arn blesses us by applying the Ab Stretch, his thick body twisting Powers’ ripped abs. Tully gets in on the punishment by pulling Arn’s hand for leverage whenever the ref is distracted.
Even the more powerful Stallion is no match for these Real Men.
All good things must come to an end, and Powers eventually tags in his partner Powerful Paul. Roma had been presented as unbeatable earlier in the match, but nevertheless, he is also soon over-powered thanks to the Brainbusters’ cheating and apparently the voluminous testosterone coursing through their thick frames.
When the ref is across the ring fucking around with cute Jimmy Powers, the cheaters implement a deadly Spike Pile-Driver on their muscle boy. No matter how much a Young Stallion works out, this devastating move is going to conk him out and destroy him!
Oh no! Not ANOTHER Spike Piledriver!!
Those dirty Brainbusters had so much fun injuring Roma with their double-team Pile-Driver, they decide to hurt him with another one. Once again Roma’s body is hoisted up and driven down, with Tully adding his body weight to the spine-cracking pressure.
(Actually this was a replay of the above Spike Pile-Driver shown after the end of the match. However, I really get into seeing the Pile-Driver implemented repeatedly without mercy, so I wrote this description as if the cheaters Pile-Drove Roma twice. It’s just hotter that way.)
What a humiliating defeat.
Check out the defeated Paul Roma, pinned under Arn’s bulky mass. The Trunk Cam zooms in to further emasculate the loser by putting his crotch on display.
Nice match. Of course the true Real Men dominate the hairless young Muscle Boys.
