After I posted my article asking how you would change the rules in pro wrestling, one of my readers sent me a link to this video clip of a sexy one-sided beating from this week’s episode of TNA Impact.
Scrappy little Austin Aries is fighting the much larger, much angrier Bobby Lashley. Wow, just look at that delicious contrast in size and power! Lashely is gonna CRUSH him!
Lashley demonstrates beastly ruthlessness by shoving poor Aries off the top rope! Our hero must be very unlucky, because his face happens to crash exactly into the steel steps next to the ring, the WORST possible place to land.
As Aries suffers out on the floor like a pathetic jobber, the camera offers a gorgeous image of Lashley’s powerful back. SWOON! I mentioned previously that I enjoy seeing a muscular, well-contoured back, and this big Lashley has me scrambling to hit “Pause.”
The power of Big Dominant Lashley and his thick back is contrasted with the utter helplessness of poor Aries as the camera zooms in on the ragdoll and his stunned expression. Rather than contort his face into a mask of anguish, Aries portrays a vegetable, his eyes glazed, his mouth relaxed. He is completely at Lashley’s mercy now!
We want to scream at Aries: “Get up, GET UP and defend yourself!” as we see Lashley climbing out of the ring and sauntering over to punish Aries some more.
The commentators meanwhile add excitement to the scene by discussing how utterly destroyed he is: “He is out — look at him! He’s OUT!” “You’re right, he is DONE.”
I couldn’t capture images of the next few killer moves, but Lashley proceeds to yank Aries up by the waistband and toss him like a discarded toy into the steps once again. Then he waits for Aries to slowly rise to his knees, and SPEARS him like a sitting duck, which the commentator describes as being “turned inside out.”
Usually a veteran and fan-favorite like Aries will avoid placing himself in this state of utter submission — he doesn’t want to look like a little bitch after all. So he will fight back some, or it will take a few villains to over-power him. But Aries plays the total ragdoll jobber here, acting like the weakest, sissiest pro wrestler since Red Tyler or Trent Knight.
Clearly the match is over, both men counted out of the ring. The bell has rung, so Lashley is supposed to stop fighting, right? But Lashley is insatiable as he continues to devour Aries. He holds Aries’ body overhead like Bane getting ready to break Batman.
Here is how my reader who told me about this “match” described it: “Bobby Lashey totally ignores the rules, he didn’t care if he won or lost, and then he gave Austin Aries one of the most vicious and sexiest beatings.”
And then the climax of the scene — gripping Aries’ arm between his thick thighs, Lashley applies a grinding Crippler Crossface. We can see Aries’ eyes are closed and his lips relaxed — he is totally out cold. He offers zero resistance, allowing Lashley to bend and break him at will. One of the comments posted under this YouTube video shows that I am not the only freak out there who loves this sort of one-sided violence:
“Culminating the show with a total annihilation of Austin Aries at the hands of a vicious and vindictive Bobby Lashley was an unadulterated treat for all of your enjoyment. Words cannot describe how phenomenal TNA was tonight.” Indeed.
